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Witty quotes!

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This exercise includes 11 quotes made by Mark Twain,Albert Einstein and Groucho Marx.What I've done is erase some words and turn it into a gap filling exercise for advanced students sitting for CPE and ECPE.After filling the gaps it could be used for speaking as the students could comment on each one.I bet you'll enjoy it too! It's up to you which words to erase.
1. A classic—something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
2. The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creatures that cannot.
3. Put all your eggs in the one basket and—WATCH THAT BASKET
4. If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
5. As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality
6. When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity.
7. It’s the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge,
8. Although it is generally known, I think it’s about time to announce that I was born at a very early age,
9. Please accept my resignation. I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.
10. I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. . . . The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.
11. Either he’s dead or my watch has stopped

Michael Pozantzis,Athens Greece pozantzismike@hotmail.com

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